Hey, sorry I'm a day late...it's been a hectic week and getting on to write to you has been challenging. But all of this "busi-ness" has reminded me about what I am really focusing on these days: BOUNDARIES.
In this day and age, there is ALWAYS something to do, right?
Work, kids, friends, family, laundry, dinner plans, working out...the list goes on and on...but where does it stop?
Does it stop at burn out?
Does it stop when you get into an argument?
Does it stop when you hit rock bottom?
The most common answer I get from friends about their week was that "it was busy". STOP the insanity! Make yourself some boundaries!
Don't get me wrong, this is something I'm working on as well. I have the worst habit of going above and beyond; which normally means I do more work than expected, that gets little acknowledgement or compensation. Why do I do it? I guess it's my love language: Words of Affirmation. But time after time of not getting it makes me upset and frustrated, but I have no one to be upset at except myself.
So here are some guidelines I have been taking to draw some boundaries.
If you are employed, then you most likely have an annual review based on your job description. On average, 50 - 60% of employees do their set job, but do not over perform. I call them the clock tickers - they show up, clock in then clock out. They are a Type -A person's worst nightmare, but they have better work-life balance, lower income, less work stress and seem to just have fun all the time.
DON'T TAKE ON MORE THAN YOU CAN
Although taking on more responsibility may seem the best way to get your boss' attention, if you already head up several other tasks, leave it to someone else to take it on.
BECOME AN EXPERT AT YOUR POSITION
You don't need to do every job under the roof to get noticed. Learn all the details of your job's ins and outs, but don't worry about the other things. Become the expert at your position and you will shine.
If you are an entrepreneur, make sure you have a schedule to keep your tasks on point. Apps like Asana or even your calendar app can help you make guidelines. Ensure you are also listening to your body when you just need rest.
With friends and lovers...
If you take a look at your close friends, you will probably find a pattern. I recently came to my attention that two of my very close friends are quite similar. 🤯
DON'T ALWAYS SAY YES
You don't always have to agree with your friends, having a difference of opinion keeps things interesting, they are your confidant and keeps you on the right side of crazy.
DON'T ALWAYS GIVE IN
You also don't always need to BE there. You don't need to meet them for coffee, stop at the grocery store, or do what they want to do. Be your own person. JUST say NO.
Be kind to yourself, you have accomplished a great deal. Creating boundaries with your self allows you to accept what you have accomplished, gives you freedom and allowances to do things you want or don't want to do.
Do you need boundaries or do you have ones already in place?
Reply to let me know.
Until the next time,
Eat well. Work hard. Seize wellness.